Who even updates websites anymore? I don't. Just follow me on IG.

I like to make dumb, nerdy geology and science "art", which you can buy on t-shirts and other soul-less merchandise at my Threadless shop.

Write a fake review of my college teaching here.

Here's some music I've been listening to.

Download a narcissistic font made from my handwriting. Now, go make your own at Fontifier.com.

Listen to me sound like an idiot in 1993 on a public radio call-in show with Florida Governor Lawton Chiles.

Experience the mellifluous song of my pet cockatiel, Fogal (R.I.P), who loved to serenade feet and lampshades.

Here's me again on NPR in 2007 blabbing about how I spend your tax dollars in a geological research laboratory. Thanks everyone for your support.